What Is Happening With A-Rod and J.Lo’s Well-Timed St. Tropez Vacations?

Alex Rodriguez and Jennifer Lopez have been spending a lot of unplanned time together, for two people who are supposed to be moving on with their respective new hot, white partners. Now perhaps this is a happy accident of the universe pushing these two wealthy people back together by forcing a meet-cute in St. Tropez, but that is highly unlikely considering JLo and ARod are both Leos and Leos refuse to be subject to the machinations of the universe.

J.Lo’s trip to St. Tropez was planned for two reasons, the first being her birthday celebration, which she likely planned out before her breakup with A-Rod in April. Coincidentally, A-Rod’s birthday is a few days after J.Lo’s, so they probably both filled out their PTO forms for this specific week in July, and both intended to be in St. Tropez celebrating their refusal to age. However, the minor hiccup of their split put Ben Affleck into the mix. On July 24, JLo’s birthday, Bennifer 2.0 gave the world a gift: a recreation of the ass-grabbing yacht scene from “Jenny From the Block.” Happy birthday to all of us, really.

Three days later, on A-Rod’s birthday, he also had some yacht photos circulating—but seeing as how he forgot to invite his stylist and a professional photographer on his vacation, they were much less enticing than his ex’s yacht photos.

After Rodriguez got off his yacht he took a few strolls around St. Tropez and, according to Page Six, managed to visit the same stores JLo had been to just hours prior. In his defense, St. Tropez is a relatively small town encompassing a little over five square miles, and within that space, there are only so many stores that the rich and famous can bless with their presence.

JLo is still on her vacation, but is now on the Amalfi Coast, still sailing the yacht with Ben, according to People. A-Rod, for his part, has been slow to update his Instastory, which can mean one of two things: Either he is still nursing a hangover from partying in St. Tropez and playing charades with the Decker family, or he is riding a jet ski over to the Amalfi Coast to casually bump into his ex once more. Either way, I need these two to take a week off from their respective paparazzi schedules so my keyboard can cool down.