Using Jesus, Defiant High Heel-Wearing Woman Defeats Arthritis

Women wear heels for many reasons — to look long-legged, to stand at eye level with taller men, because they have Barbie feet. I, for one, wear heels so that if I’m attacked while walking to or from the train, my footwear can double as a weapon, plus, “My goodness gracious, how do you not break your neck?” is a great conversation starter with strangers concerned about the well being of my skeleton. One blogger, however sees things a little differently.

Meet The ShoeLadiee, a fashion blogger who recently found that she has an autoimmune disease called rheumatoid arthritis, which causes inflammation and pain in the joints. SL has, in the past, enjoyed wearing heels and seen it as a celebration of her femininity. But, alas, her disease threatens to come between her and her chosen shoes.

When most people find out they have a chronic, progressive disease like rheumatoid arthritis, they change their lifestyle to minimize the pain of their disease. They diet or exercise or wear insoles or start taking insulin injections. But not ShoeLadiee. She has a secret weapon. She writes,

Well, A DISEASE called RHEUMATOID ARTHRITIS was going to be my cause of not wearing heels but I chose to put my God’s word to the practice, which states that by Jesus’ stripes, I’ am healed, which means I DO NOT have to accept ANY SICKNESS OR DEFEAT because Jesus conquered it ALL on the cross.

I’ve read that Jesus did all sorts of cool stuff — walk on water, condemn a fig tree to death, multiply loaves and fishes, rise from the dead — but allow everyone to wear whatever shoes they want? That’s a new one!

Furthermore, argues SL, if she were to cease letting Louboutin take the wheel, she would actually be letting the devil win.

I wear heels because it is my way of letting the DEVIL know that his weapon formed against me DID NOT prosper. Living with this disease, wearing heels is & should not be physically possible, but oh by the GRACE OF GOD & THE BLOOD OF JESUS, I have been wearing heels since my diagnosis in Fall 2008. I have been living with this disease for 3 almost 4 years now, and I can count on one hand how many times I have had a flare up. I’ am also dance choreography, which SHOULD NOT be physical possible BUT GOD! I was determined not to live in DEFEAT, so I made the decision to not live in DEFEAT.

She’s cured herself of disease by refusing to acknowledge it and suggesting that God just handle it. It’s so crazy it just might work!

I bet the devil is so pissed when he sees her Facebook page. I’m picturing him vicestalking her profile, What’s this? Oh, I see ShoeLadiee, whom I’ve recently given arthritis because that kind of thing is fun for me because my job is to just fuck with people, has added some new photos. And then the Devil clicks on them and sees that she is wearing heels in the photos which means that his evil magic spell did not work, and, I don’t know, flames shoot out of his ears and he implodes into a black hole and all the souls escape from hell and proceed immediately to The Shoe Ladiee’s house to thank her for saving everything.

I can’t believe that we humans have been living in fear of The Satan for thousands of years now, and defeating him for good was as simple as wearing uncomfortable footwear. Boy, do I feel silly.