Upper East Side Parents Reportedly Disappointed to Lose Their Extremely Tenuous Connection to Royalty

NOT!!!!! the future school of Prince George. Photo via Getty Images.
NOT!!!!! the future school of Prince George. Photo via Getty Images.

Please spare a thought today for Upper East Side parents who have learned that their children will NOT be attending a Manhattan chapter of the same school as wee autocrat Prince George. Truly, we all face hardships and setbacks in this life.


This news via—where else?—Page Six:

Some Upper East Side parents are feeling burned now that Prince George is starting school at Thomas’s Battersea instead of Wetherby-Pembridge, where his father, Prince William, and uncle, Prince Harry, began their education.

Wetherby is opening a New York outpost in September in a Beaux Arts mansion off Central Park, and local Anglophiles applied for their toddlers’ admission there when it was widely assumed that some royalty would be rubbing off on them from across the pond.


Well you know what they say about assumptions—they make an ass out of you and me.

Senior Editor, Attic Haunter, Jezebel

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The Noble Renard

Can we all agree that the entire Upper East Side could be eliminated without much loss to the rest of New York? I mean, keep Museum Mile, sure, but the rest? Ehhhhh....