Ugh. This man’s face.
Here’s all the shit we couldn’t cover today:
- Trump is a very good, level-headed president, who definitely does not deserve to be impeached, which is why his coming unhinged in a press conference today—shout-talking nonsensical demands, rather like a small child begging for Choco Crispies in the supermarket aisle—is completely shocking and out of character. (Also it is Opposite Day!) [Vox]
- More crime time for lawyer Michael Avenatti; this time, federal prosecutors have charged him with embezzling $300,000 from Stormy Daniels’ book advance, for serious legal purposes like leasing a Ferrari. [Wall Street Journal]
- Sen. Kamala Harris reintroduced a bill to tackle the high rate of maternal mortality among Black women by funding implicit bias training in hospitals. [Refinery29]
- Speaking of families, Sen. Kirsten Gillibrand’s campaign unveiled a suite of proposals aimed to improve life for parents, including a national family leave program, universal Pre-K, a requirement that health insurers cover in vitro fertilization, and a set of policies designed to improve health care access for rural mothers. [Politico]
- Composting human remains is now legal in Washington State. Combined with wood chips and straw, a body creates roughly “two wheelbarrows” of dirt, objectively a very large amount. I, for one, would like to fertilize some Early Girl tomatoes when I go. [NBC]
- Nevada signed on to the National Popular Vote Interstate Compact, a collection of states pledging their electoral college votes to whomever wins the popular vote. The movement still needs additional pledges, however, to hit the 270 electoral votes required to be president—and good luck signing Wyoming! [Washington Post]
- The New York State legislature approved a bill to give Congress access to Trump’s tax records. [Washington Post]
- U.S. Customs and Border Protection, maintaining very good conditions, has stopped accepting new admits to its McAllen, Tex. center, after a teenager died in custody on Monday. A number of other residents with high fevers and “flulike” symptoms have been quarantined. [Washington Post]
Here are some tweets the president was allowed to publish:
Apple MacBook Air Laptop
The M1 chip delivers 3.5x faster performance than the previous generation all while using way less power. Get up to 18 hours of battery life.
This has been Barf Bag.