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Trump Says He Was 'Brilliant' to Thwart a Bad Tax System

Photo Credit: Getty Images
Photo Credit: Getty Images

Donald Trump—the bewigged swollen gallbladder who is somehow still a contender for president of the United States—thinks that his ability to thwart the country’s tax system emphasizes his ability to be a great president.

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CNN reports that Trump has addressed the release of his taxes at rallies, arguing that defeating a bad system doesn’t make him corrupt, but “brilliant.” In fact, it’s lucky for us that he knows how to weasel out of paying taxes, because he’ll marshal those same skills as president!

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“I’m working for you now — I’m not working for Trump,” he said at a rally in Pueblo, Colorado.

Having declared almost $1 billion in losses in 1995, Trump could have legally avoided paying income taxes for the next 18 years. According to Trump, he was just doing what was best for business.

“It’s my job to minimize the overall tax burden,” he explained.

Then, as he is so wont to do, Trump got a bit cocky.

“I have legally used the tax laws to my benefit...Honestly, I have brilliantly used those laws.”

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In the meantime, Trump still refuses to release his federal income tax returns. The New York Times did not receive this material, but only one page of his New York State resident income tax returns and a page of New Jersey and Connecticut nonresident returns. He accuses the media of an “obsession” with his taxes, although he is the first presidential nominee since 1976 to withhold them.

Trump also claims that, in fact, he pays a wide array of taxes.

“I face enormous taxes — city, state, sales, excise, employee, federal, VAT, different countries,” he listed at the Pueblo rally. So maybe we should just give him a break on the income tax, eh?

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Trump’s supporters were certainly on board, cheering after he remarked, “I must tell you, I hate the way they spend our tax dollars.”

And as he told the American people when he took to Twitter on Sunday morning, nobody—but nobody—understands taxes like he does. We’ll be lost without him, Our Savior Donald.

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DISCUSSION

The real story is no longer even remotely that this deranged, colossally ignorant, mendacious, and malicious man has somehow become the nominee of a major party. The Republican Party is nothing but a racist con job and money-laundering operation anyhow, it has been running on fumes for a generation. So yeah, whatever. Dole, Dubya, McCain, Mitt...Trump really is just the next logical point along the Republican continuum (which means we really, really don’t want to think about who they’re going to hatch out in 2020).

But that’s beside the point.

The real story is that there are millions of American voters who—seeing all this, seeing the craziness, the ignorance, the mendacity, the sheer destructive force and the incredible, anti-constitutional malice—cheer lustily, scream with laughter when he threatens to upend the democratic order, howl with delight when he makes a racist or violent or sexually crude comment, and, by all that’s holy, plan to vote for the rancid son of a bitch.

Trump won’t be around forever. If there is a God in heaven (or even if there isn’t, but Democrats manage to make their way to the polls), he will lose the election, and that will be that. Goom-bye, Donnie.

But these dreadful people—some of them my neighbors, and a couple of them members of my extended family (Jesus H Christ, Grandma!! what are you thinking? what the fuck is the matter with you?)—they are here for the long run, God help us. They’re the real story.

They are not merely deplorable; they are awful, they are monstrous. They are America-haters, a lynch mob, racists, authoritarian thugs, outright loons. They actually make my flesh crawl.

I could still be friends with people who voted for Romney or McCain—well, there was Palin, but—yeah, what the hell. I could even forgive Grandma for voting for Dubya.

But Trump? no. This is the fucking bridge too far. These people who support him are worse than he ever dreamed of being.