True Blood: "Conscience Off, Dick On"

Last night's premiere of True Blood picked up right where the last season left off.

Bill's been kidnapped, Sam's looking for his family, Jason shot Eggs (but Andy's taking credit for it), and Jessica's killed a trucker.


Many characters were dealing with the aftermath of death. Jason found it difficult to have a three-way, because he kept picturing bullet holes in the heads of the young ladies he was attempting to bone. Tara, despite Lafayette's prescription of Vicodin and tequila, was distraught over losing Eggs. And Jessica was stressing out: When a young vampire accidentally kills a dude she met at a truck stop, what the hell is she supposed to do with the body?

Highlights from the episode:

  • Terry's pep talk for Andy. "I love you, cuz."
  • Andy's pep talk to Jason: "Conscience off, dick on!" It may be a formula for "acting normal," but isn't it also what being a vampire is all about?
  • Arlene's casual racism: "I hate when they make everything about race."
  • Eric's ass. [clip slightly NSFW]
  • Sam's dream, aka Bill and Sam's Excellent Homoerotic Adventure.
  • Lafayette's belted outfit.
Illustration for article titled True Blood: "Conscience Off, Dick On"
  • Hoyt to Jessica: "I miss you."
  • "Pussy overflow."
  • "Naw, hooker, look, I can't sell all this shit by tomorrow."
  • Wolves! Not CGI wolves! Real wolves!
Illustration for article titled True Blood: "Conscience Off, Dick On"

Earlier: Previously On True Blood


Someone tell me this show isn't as hick as it looks. I love vampires to death, and I keep hearing how great these books are and how good the show is, but every time I see a bit of it it just seems so... -redneck-.

Is it as bad as it seems? I mean, I live in the middle of Appalachia, I get enough redneck from my neighbors and everywhere else for 20 miles around, I don't need it infesting my vampires too...

I'm hoping someone can tell me it's not so. D: