Vote 2020 graphic
Everything you need to know about and expect during
the most important election of our lifetimes

This November, I'm Voting Third Party

Image via Shutterstock.
Image via Shutterstock.

There are fewer than two months to go until election day, and the 2016 presidential campaign has finally completed its transition from bizarre and occasionally hilarious piece of performance art to a reminder of the increasingly bleak reality of our country’s political system.

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But as discourse in this election cycle continues to devolve, and media coverage of frontrunners Hillary Clinton and Donald Trump better resembles Us Weekly than it does The New York Times, I’ve decided that the two-party system is no longer for me. I’ve had it with the mud-slinging. I’m finished with the TMZ-ification of politics. I don’t know what either party stands for anymore, apart from the total obliteration of their opponent.

And that’s why I, Bobby Finger, will take a stand this November by refusing to take part in our country’s political binary.

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I will NOTE be voting for a Democrat.

I will NOT be voting for a Republican.

This man’s vote is going somewhere else entirely:

Image via Marie Claire
Image via Marie Claire

I’M VOTING FOR STYLE!!!

Staff Writer, Jezebel | Man

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DISCUSSION

doughnaught
doughnaught

Jesus, you scared me for a minute there.