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This Is Jojo Siwa's Final Form

Illustration for article titled This Is Jojo Siwas Final Form
Image: Getty

Jojo Siwa celebrated her Sweet 16 Tuesday evening the only way she knew how: with a wildly age-inappropriate birthday party built of Nickelodeon nightmares at the W Hotel in Hollywood. (For what it’s worth, she doesn’t actually turn the big one until next month, but who cares? This is her rainbow-filled, shimmery, bow-adorned pseudo-reality, we’re just living adjacent to it.) To celebrate her ability to drive the hideous car her parents gifted her for Christmas (the same one Justin Bieber insulted), Siwa went all out with her outfit, substituting her normally subdued bedazzled clothing for head-to-toe sequins, exaggerated shoulders (more room for more sequins), an A-line pom-pom skirt that might as well have been pulled, strand by strand, from the mane of a My Little Pony, and a big, bright blue (of course, sequined) bow.

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Don’t look directly at her, it’s like staring into the sun:

Illustration for article titled This Is Jojo Siwas Final Form
Image: Getty
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The only way to make Jojo more Jojo? Give her sparkly wheels. This is her final form.

Illustration for article titled This Is Jojo Siwas Final Form
Image: Getty

What kind of rave is this? These children cannot possibly be her friends?

Illustration for article titled This Is Jojo Siwas Final Form
Image: Getty
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To be fair, the outfit is kinda perfect for her—and reminds me of the Heatherette graffiti tutu look Teyana Taylor wore in her episode of MTV’s My Super Sweet 16 back in 2007:

Illustration for article titled This Is Jojo Siwas Final Form
Screenshot: Twitter/MTV
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Maybe this is fashion after all? I need a nap.

Senior Writer, Jezebel. My debut book, LARGER THAN LIFE: A History of Boy Bands, is out now.

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DISCUSSION

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That outfit has like a 80's/90's futuristic vibe. Like Jem and Holograms meets Rainbow Brite. As a child, I wanted to change my name to She-Ra Rainbow Brite Mary Poppins Princess of Power so I am really digging this outfit. As a 15/16 year old, I would not have rocked it because I got real dark in high school.

This seems more like a branding event to sell her merch to children than a real birthday party.

I’m still trying to tell if she actually loves this look (which that’s fine if she does) or if it’s really just all about the $$/brand at this point. She sells it well either way.