You know that nightmare you keep having with the three little girls in American flag dresses who sing songs about what great president Donald Trump would be, tonelessly shouting lyrics like Apologies for freedom? I can’t handle this! and Enemies of freedom, face the music! Come on, boys! Take ‘em down!
Bad news, pal. Your nightmare is real and taking place—just as you suspected—at a Trump rally in Pensacola, Florida.
Hm, it’s like deep down in your subconscious, you always knew that the only thing that would destroy your love of freedom was a nightmare collection of human cartoons named the Freedom Girls. Ironic.
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Anyway, welcome to hell!
Contact the author at madeleine@jezebel.com.