Things Ain't Going So Great for Poor Barbie

Illustration for article titled Things Ain't Going So Great for Poor Barbie

Mattel just wrapped up another coulda-been-better quarter, and guess who's to blame? That's right, our spendthrift frenemy Barbie.

That's according to the AP, which reports that in Q3, Barbie sales slid 21 percent. That's on top of a 15 percent drop in Q2. Nor is this a sudden reversal striking like the proverbial bolt from the blue. At this rate, I'll be passing down my American Girl clothes (Molly 4ever) instead of my mom's Barbie clothes. Not that the Pleasant Company division is totally untouched: After a 6 percent gain in Q2, sales dropped 7 percent in Q3. That's on top of losing Frozen merch to Hasbro.

At least the old gal's got plenty of careers to fall back on. Maybe think of downsizing to a Malibu Dreamcondo, though?


Photo via Getty.

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My sister passed on her Barbies to me when I was old enough to know not to swallow her high heels. I didn't like them much. I preferred the Easy Bake Oven and this horribly dangerous science set that had a gazillion jars of shit you don't want your kids playing with. Probably had a jar of asbestos in there. My favorite "toy" was probably a bunch of scrap wood, nails, and a hammer my Dad gave me to "make something with"... I made a pyramid and then nailed a huge plastic spider to the top of it. I also melted crayons on the hot tip of a glue gun... a lot. I was a weird kid. Here's hoping my daughter doesn't want Barbies because the new Easy Bake Ovens are fuckin' sweeet!