They're Rebuilding the Titanic Because What Could Possibly Go Wrong

By Madeleine Davies | February 19, 2013 | 8:00pm

Entertainment Movies

You know how the movie Titanic makes the real Titanic seem like the most fun ever? Every time, I watch it, I think to myself, “Why was I born now and not then when I could have been on that boat?” The parties? The class divisions? The multiple spoons and nudie pics? Does that all not just scream “harmless fun that we definitely won’t pay for with our lives”? By the way, I have never seen the second half of movie. How does it end? Never mind — don’t tell me.

Anyway, GREAT NEWS. Australian billionaire Clive Palmer is having an exact Titanic replica built by a Chinese ship manufacturer, which definitely sounds the opposite of worrying. So far, over 40,000 people have expressed interest in riding the replica which, if all goes as planned, will follow the exact route from Southampton to New York City taken by the original Titanic in 1912. Some guests have even said that they’ll pay up to $1 million per ticket to ride on the ship’s maiden voyage. Once finished, the Titanic II will accomodate 2,400 guests, none of whom are likely to drown, have a smoke stack collapse on them or freeze in the Atlantic Ocean at any point in the journey.