Vote 2020 graphic
Everything you need to know about and expect during
the most important election of our lifetimes

These Are the Best Captions in Kim Kardashian's Book of Selfies

Illustration for article titled These Are the Best Captions in Kim Kardashians Book of Selfies

Selfish, Kim Kardashian-West’s book of selfies, was released Tuesday and I spent nearly half an hour flipping through each of its 445 pages. Though I had spent many months looking forward to the silly collection of photographs, I was delighted to find that Selfish had a surprise waiting up the sleeves of its dust jacket: Kim’s captions. Not every photo is treated to Kim’s brief prose (they’re in her handwriting!), but those that are are the book’s best treat.


Below are a few of my favorites.

I’ve left the accompanying photos out because what you imagine them to be is likely 100% accurate.


On lies we make up to enhance a narrative:

My very first selfie was taken in 1984. I put my mom’s clip-on earrings on Khloé and found a disposable camera and took a picture to capture this memory.

On her transformative friendship with Paris Hilton:

I had never really traveled until I met Paris. She showed me a whole new world.

On how boring Indianapolis is:

We were bored in Indianapolis taking photo booth pics.

On vibes and their multitudes:

It was a futuristic shoot. I love doing photo shoots and having memories and so many different vibes.


On 3-minute meals:

I watched the show with Ryan Seacrest and then went home and had Cup noodles in bed at my apartment.


On the importance of cropping:

I look naked but I’m wearing a strapless dress.

On Ciara’s impact:

This was the first time I met Lala. BFFs ever since! Ciara introduced us.

On things that are problematic:

I was in Africa in a diamond mine.

On starter homes:

I took so many selfies in this mirror. It was at the 1st home I owned.

On 2010:


On optical illusions:

I’m obsessed with contour.

On turning points:

I just got this Fendi coat and was in New York. I was in a taxi and took this selfie to actually send the Kanye to see if he liked my new coat. He did!


On marriage:

At the Yeezus show. I’m his #1 groupie. #TourLife #WifeLife

On favorites:

Bikini selfies are my fave.

On things that should have remained personal:

Fresh spray tan. I get so dark...Kanye calls it a yé-tan.

On hacking:

I wasn’t intending to put these in the book but saw them online during the icloud hack. I’m not mad at them. lol They are taken with a blackberry and I don’t have’s all a mystery!


On travel:

Thailand - I don’t think I’ve ever taken as many selfies as I did in Thailand. It’s one of the prettiest places I’ve ever traveled to!


On her love of wildlife:

I just wanted a selfie with an elephant. This pic was taken before the elephant scared me.


On the inevitability of change:

I took a selfie at a red light while driving. I think that’s illegal now.

Image via Amazon.

Contact the author at


Share This Story

Get our newsletter


Molly with the Mediocre Hair

I put my mom’s clip-on earrings on Khloé and found a disposable camera and took a picture to capture this memory.”