"There Is Nothing Sexier Than A Beautiful Woman Who Can't Poop"

By Jessica Coen  |  March 3, 2010 | 10:20pm
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Yesterday, I made a confession: I have traveler’s constipation. And when I get on a plane to see my long-distance boyfriend, I get so backed-up that I end up not letting him touch me. Thankfully, there’s someone else who will.

March 3, 2010 3:08:13 PM EST
To: [email protected]
From: Tom
Subject: Have you moved your bowels yet?
There is nothing sexier than a beautiful woman who can’t poop, and you qualify on both counts (if Google Images is to be believed). If that long-distance boyfriend deal ever falls through, please give me a call!
Have you achieved relief yet? And what’s the longest you’ve ever gone without a bowel movement?
Your faithful reader,
Tom
202-(xxx)-(xxxx)

Image via Mugley’s Flickr.

Earlier: I’m Constipated Therefore I Am: An Introduction

 
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