The Worst Pickup Line...Ever

Illustration for article titled The Worst Pickup Line...Ever

We're referring to the words allegedly spoken to Mark Wahlberg at some party for The Fighter.


According to the NY Daily News, a "young beauty" approached Wahlberg in the "VIP Section" of the Top of the Standard bar. Her line?

"Well, I'm the single girl and you're the married man."

Wahlberg allegedly "wasn't amused," and we don't know why he would be, since it wasn't remotely amusing. What it was, in fact, was depressing, degrading and reliant on archetypes that we wish didn't exist. And while we've described it as an abysmal line, there's always a chance it's worked in the past — which is more depressing still.

For all we know, Wahlberg's PR is pushing the story to highlight his upstandingness (and really, you shouldn't get special credit for normal, decent behavior) but that's not where our interests lie. Young beauty, whoever you are: you are better than this. You shouldn't be defining yourself in relationship to the nearest man, and you shouldn't buy into a world that pits "mistresses" archaically against wives. We hope that seeing this item will serve as a wake-up call. You're not "the single girl" — you're a person! A person with opinions and history, and value. You deserve to be not just in the VIP section, but in the VIP section of life!

Mark Wahlberg fights female temptation at party for flick 'Fighter,' throws jabs at pal Calvin Klein [NYDN]


Mark Wahlberg lines that work:

"I actually paid to see Planet of the Apes."

"If you go out with me, I promise to never mention the Funky Bunch."

But honestly, if this is true, boo!