The United States Of Shit-Talking

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We recently learned about Topix, the website where folks across the country can talk about who is and is not a total bitch. Intrigued, we decided to delve a little more deeply — and now we present to you a sampling of shit people are talking across the country. Read on for the dirt on mental hospitals, dentists, girls, and more. It's as American as apple pie.

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California

Los Angeles

Hypocrisy!
Yeah, that's the best word you can use for describing american girls!!!!
Like my Girlfriend!!!
AMERICAN GIRLS YOU ARE THE WORSE EVER!!!

Redding

Has anybody else in or around RDG noticed this?!
There's a few of them... Theyre basically balls of red, white, and blue fluttering lights. One of them had a few bright orb-like things revolving around a red, white, and blue ball in the center. They randomly move to different places in the sky. NO EFFING LIE: Four of them are currently lined up horizontally, still flittering. This is pretty insane.

Kentucky

Corbin

Does anybody else think that [redacted] is a major dick head and needs to get a life. He puts on a front of a church going person but everytime you turn around he is drinking with his buddies. He always acts nice to your face but talks about everybody behind their back. And he has never been able to keep his thing in his pants ask his ex wife.

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Prestonburg

Everyone that walks out of there walks out with a bright new shiny set of false teeth! He likes to pull teeth to get paid for it. He is a crook! Stay away from this dentist!!!

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Maryland

Sykesville

the did all kinds of evil things to the mentally ill back in the day. if there is ever a place that would be haunted, its an old mental hospital

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Massachusetts

Leominster

Hopefully, the next time I see your nasty self will be in pergatory as I will watch God read you the riot act for being such a nasty whench!

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Missouri

Rolla

ive yet to meet an ashlee, ashley, ashleigh, that i actually like. they are either dumb bitches or stuck up bitches but either way nobody likes the bitches.

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New York

Rome

If you are not a Tea Bagger you are a true horse's ass! Whatever happened to your job at the jail? Why did you lose the election by a landslide in which your opponent beat you by 79% to 21%? You were beaten by an Unknown in his first run in politics. How come everyone that went to school or worked with you or knows you describes you as CRAZY?

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Ohio

Ripley

this little blonde named [redacted] was in the riv bragging about how she snitched on them.she won 2nd place in the bikini contest and is like around 50 yrs old. watch out for her!!

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Texas

Del Rio

did u see where the illuminati supposably planned the attack on the twin towers and the pentagon that the us illuminati planned it

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Uvalde (from a thread titled "DQ workers are rude"):

Yea they r rude an dumb an that girl in the back with Elvis side Burns thinks she's gud but she is NT lol

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Earlier: Website Helps Small-Town Residents Be Jerks To Each Other

Image via Shutterstock.com

DISCUSSION

By
Steve_Buscemi's_Orthodontist

Rules for Talking Shit:

1. Proper Grammar: Spelling, punctuation, and grammar are key. Nothing derails a solid rant, bitch-fest, or smackdown like a poorly worded mishmash of letters, grunts, and misplaced commas. Don't be Sarah Palin.

2. Make Sound Argument: Nothing is worse than a poorly constructed argument. Example: "Fucking bike riders hogging up the goddamned rode with their two wheels, skinny jeans, and 12 year-old beards. Fuck them! I pay taxes and I own the roads!" Yes. Because bike riders: A) Never own cars B) Never pay taxes and C) Shut the fuck up. This argument is stupid.

3. Don't get Caught with your Pants Down - I.E. The Every Preacher Ever Argument: It's simple. If you're gonna run your mouth about how Joe Schmoe does X and X is wrong, you better not be putting your penis in X (or Joe) on the sly.

4. Comedy is Golden: Beating your opponent is great. Turning said beating into a ticket-sales worthy event is even better.

5. Don't Overdo It: This is the final, and most important, rule (one that I am guilty of breaking - seeing as I'm a perpetual line crosser - oh rebel!). Beating your opponent is one thing. Lighting them on fire, pissing on their ashes, and then eating their dog is entirely different. People are weird - they like to see others get what they deserve but they don't want you to overdo it. There's a fine line between comeuppance and wholesale destruction. Each case is different so it's impossible to provide a general rule. However, if what you're saying may drive someone to eat a bullet - then it's a safe bet that you've found the line.