The Tackiest Reality TV Mansion in America Is Now For Sale

Illustration for article titled The Tackiest Reality TV Mansion in America Is Now For Sale
Image: Kena Betancur (Getty Images)

In the early part of the last decade, Real Housewife Teresa Giudice illustrated the banality of wealthy suburban domesticity, and for the greater chunk of her married life, provided viewers with a helpful checklist of clothing and accessories to be avoided at all costs. But her most bountiful contribution, by leagues, was her crumbling McMansion in Montville Township, New Jersey.

The New York Post reports that the Italian-American Queen of Versailles has re-listed the six-bedroom, five-bathroom, 10,000-square-foot ruin for $2.25 million. Images of the property famously surfaced during a 2010 auction of all her and husband Joe Giudice’s belongings, after they had declared bankruptcy that October. As seen then and now in new photos on realtor.com, the estate is tacky beyond belief. Marble coats just about every surface, with delicately carved wooden embellishments straight from the cigar rooms and Victorian sex dungeons of the old world. No wonder she had to slash that price by $250,000, according to the Post!

It will cost at least that much to remove any trace of the previous owners from the property.

Should one be in the mood for this ancient estate, consider its spacious outdoor area, double staircase, 100 million chandeliers, black marble flooring, two garages, and more than 800-square-foot bedroom. Yes! Her bedroom is over 800 square feet, and that’s without the bathroom or walk-in closets or additional nooks and crannies. The backyard features a pool now, and the bottom floor of the mansion sports a den, an office, a game room, and more.

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It cannot be understated just how much mahogany is in this house.

Onto more pressing matters. Where will Miss Giudice live next? With a rumored new man in her life, the Post reports that she might shack up with him, all the way over in Allendale. For now, grab a glass of cabernet and pour it out onto the floor, in memory of the tackiest house on reality television, ever. Goodbye forever!

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DISCUSSION

I am fully aware that I may have tacky taste in decorating but I’d 100% rather live there than whatever the hell all-white minimalist black mirror episode Kim K lives in. We Italians are a gaudy people, let us live.

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