The Book Of Jezebel: P Is For Proposal (How To Respond To A Marriage)

Illustration for article titled The Book Of Jezebel: P Is For Proposal (How To Respond To A Marriage)

As you may have heard, on October 22nd we'll be publishing our first book, a 300-page, hardcover, illustrated encyclopedia called The Book of Jezebel. In honor of this milestone —which took many years and dozens of contributors to execute—we'll be posting one entry from the book a day, starting with "A" and continuing on through to "Z." Although the book itself has already been printed — it's gorgeous — questions, additions, annotations and suggestions on the entries that appear online are welcomed and encouraged.

Proposal (How to Respond to A Marriage)

Should you say "I Will" or "I Won't"? "I Do" or "I Don't"? Scooch up a little closer and consult this cheeky flowchart.

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Illustration for article titled The Book Of Jezebel: P Is For Proposal (How To Respond To A Marriage)

(Flowchart by Elizabeth Carey Smith for The Book of Jezebel.)

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DISCUSSION

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Drool to Elizabeth Carey Smith's various handwriting styles! I'm improving my typography right now — kind of accidentally, because my self-driven project demanded it, but it's proving to be very satisfying and luckily I'm a quick study. My actual handwriting sucks, though.

In other news, I've been dating this guy since... well, we met online in June, and in August he flew 5,000 miles just to meet me, and I'm going to stay with him for a month in November. He's the first guy I can truly imagine being married to. I know it's only been a couple of months, but we have such mutual respect and great cooperation as well as all the fun stuff and interests-in-common; even with the vast distance of 5,000 miles between us, I'm happier than ever. There's none of the pettiness or resentment I remember from my last relationship (which was also long-distance) because my emotional needs are actually being met, this time. It's pretty glorious, if bittersweet.

He knows me so well already - because we're so similar, but also because he fucking pays attention - that I know any proposal between us would be exactly as I want it. I'm not making any assumptions about the future because the long-distance part is so rough, but I'm confident that he won't spring any flash mob on me or propose in a restaurant* or do any of the other things that I've already warned him against! ;)

*What if you get food poisoning? What if the staff are rude that day? What if people videotape it and post it online? What if I choke on my food? UGH. No. Something private and outdoors is the way I want it. I'm not fussy about the details, but I just wouldn't want other people involved... and he's exactly the same kind of person as me, so if he ends up being my husband, I'm excited to see how he proposes. [I'm all for non-traditional approaches between the genders, but said "I love you" first, so the proposal part is up to him! ;) If that happens. Someday. Maybe. Probably. Possibly.]