The Bon App Recap: How Come No One Talks About Combos?

By Garrett Schlichte | March 1, 2020 | 11:00pm

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The Bon App Recap: How Come No One Talks About Combos?

Hello! I am here to report that Molly’s chicken noodle soup, which we talked about in last week’s recap, which I then went on to make, goes absolutely all the way off. It was a gorgeous golden brown which, who knew, is achieved by leaving the skin on the onions while you make the broth. And, beyond that, it tasted absolutely incredible. I had it for dinner every night last week and I was upset about it a total of zero times.

This week it seems like BA knew I had just done two weeks in one because we only got four videos, as opposed to the five or six we usually get. Thankfully, one of them was a “Gourmet Makes,” and unfortunately, one of them was an “Almost Every,” where we have to sit through almost every way to cook a hamburger.

“From the Test Kitchen” —Priya Makes Kadhi: 4/5 Would Bon

In this week’s one video about actually cooking something, Priya makes a creamy Indian soup that I do wish I could dive through my screen and consume immediately. As we’ve already covered, soup is basically my favorite food, and what Priya makes is no exception to that rule.

My personal favorite part of the video is when she basically calls out every white hipster in Williamsburg over their “discovery” of chickpea flour. “I feel like chickpea flour kind of turned into a wellness trend recently,” she said, “and people were like, ‘Oh my God, have you heard of chickpea flour,’ and every Indian ever was like ‘Yes, we use it all the time.’”

It was a great callout about this specific thing, but also the general trend in food culture of things specific to different cultures being “discovered” and then mass-marketed with no credit given to the originators of the “trend.”

I’m only docking a point here because according to Priya there are toppings that can be added to this soup, but we don’t get to see them because she doesn’t “like stuff floating around” in her soup. I do Priya! I need the stuff!

“Gourmet Makes” —Claire attempts to make gourmet Combos: 5/5 Would Bon

I’m sure you’ll get tired of this eventually, and maybe you already are but, once again, #IWDFCFTBATK (I Would Die For Claire From The Bon Appétit Test Kitchen).

The episode kicks off with Alex Delaney making the truest of proclamations, which is that Combos are the world’s best gas station snack. It is indisputable and correct, and I will hear nothing to the contrary. From there, we learn that the method for making Combos is kept somewhere with the nuclear codes because there’s nothing about it online other than a rumor that people with caulking guns full of cheese stuff each Combo individually. Probably not true, but wow what if it was?

With a lack of formal instructions, Claire proceeds to pave her own path and kick total ass. She iterates on a few different versions of the snack and once again creates something that, if you felt so compelled, you could probably recreate in your own kitchen at home. Personally, the only time I will ever eat Combos is on a road trip so I’ll never actually attempt this feat, but it was an actual joy to be with Claire for this ride.

“It’s Alive” —Brad teaches you how to sharpen kitchen knives: 4/5 Would Bon

Are your knives out? Okay, but are they sharp? If you answered no to that second question then this video is absolutely for you.

Because he actually is one, Brad reminds me of a very sweet dad who is just looking out for you and hoping that you’re doing your best. He even says so at the end of this video, which is totally useless to me at this current juncture of my life, but may be very helpful to me one day!

I’m sure there is a certain sect of BA viewers who have knives worth sharpening, I just don’t happen to be one of them. Every so often while carving into a chicken I think, is it time to get a real knife? My answer is always no because spending a lot of money on a knife still seems silly to me, but I’m sure it would actually improve my cooking experience were I to do it. Who knows, maybe this will be the video that inspires me to finally do it.

Until then, I will just let Brad inspire me to try my best at whatever is I happen to be doing, because as he says, “There’s no real wrong way to do it, as long as you’re getting the right results.”

“Almost Every” —Amiel attempts every way to cook a hamburger: 1/5 Would Bon

Wow, I hate this video. I hate this video so, so much. I have given it one point because in the first minute and thirty seconds Amiel does cook what appears to be the perfect hamburger. What happens during the remaining twenty-nine minutes of this video are only proof that the video is twenty-nine minutes too long.

There might be some worth in these videos if, for instance, they focused on real ways one might elect to cook a hamburger in real life, showing us how to avoid making mistakes that might arise out of those methods. Instead, they do gross things like sous vide a patty, putting another one in an Easy-Bake Oven. They also steam one and put one in a dehydrator which really just seems like a waste of food as opposed to being literally anything else.

In Amiel’s own words from this episode, I will say, “Gosh that looks gross,” “Don’t do this,” and “Pretty unnecessary.” At one point while putting a burger patty in the microwave Amiel says via voiceover, “They’re making me do this.”

I don’t know exactly who Amiel is talking about that’s making him do it, but please, please stop.