Starbucks Pushes Coffee For People Who Hate Starbucks

Illustration for article titled Starbucks Pushes Coffee For People Who Hate Starbucks

Starbucks is trying to turn Seattle's Best Coffee, which it acquired eight years ago, into a $1 billion company by marketing it to people who think Starbucks is too elitist. The revamped line comes in five blends, which are labeled simply 1 through 5, from mildest to strongest. The company has started selling Seattle's Best in AMC cinemas, Delta Air Lines, Burger King, Subway, and vending machines in offices, hospitals, and college campuses. The hope is that the brand will attract people who are currently drinking no-name coffees, and haven't realized that buying Seattle's Best means their money is supporting the propagation of grande triple soy sugar-free vanilla lattes.

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Any kind of sweetened or flavored latte and any kind of frozen blended drink is already "coffee" for people who don't like coffee. Coffee is a hot, bitter beverage with a complex taste of its own. If you go into a coffee shop demanding something sweet, creamy and tasting of artificial vanilla, hazelnut, gingerbread, peppermint, or whatever other crap, you have already left coffee far behind, whether or not there's a token shot of espresso somewhere in your cup.

/bitter former barista who got tired of hicks complaining that their carefully handmade cappucino doesn't taste like the stuff from the machine at Wawa/