In honor of Ted Cruz’s unexpected victory in Oklahoma and his very expected win in Texas, here are the following scenarios in which I would 100 percent vote for Ted Cruz, no questions asked.
(Even though I would ask many questions, and would never vote for him.)
^^ This tweet by Ted Cruz’s Mortal Enemy Craig Mazin™, but instead of “Oscars” I mean “votes,” “comedy” I mean “Trump,” and “dramas” I mean “Ted Cruz.”
...at least this way the Oscars aren’t so white.
I walk into Stonewall last Friday and accidentally run into Ted Cruz.
“...well, THIS could get interesting.”
Ted Cruz ascends stage.
Contact the author at firstname.lastname@example.org.
Image via Getty.