Samantha Bee Tells Us All to Get Back to Work

On Wednesday night’s episode of Full Frontal, Samantha Bee wore her sparkling blazer, saying, “Tonight it sparkles ironically.” While some of us have perhaps not showered since Tuesday, Bee is raring to go.


In the segment, Bee gives a shout out to her staff, known as one the most diverse groups in late night, and their terrified reactions to our president-elect. At least one of her staffers says he was harassed by a Trump supporter when walking from his car that very day. In all the fear and confusion about the outcome, Bee says people will be trying to figure out what happened, but she knows exactly who did this:

In the coming days people will be looking for someone to blame, the pollsters, the strident feminists, the Democratic Party, a vengeful god, but once you dust for finger prints, it’s pretty clear who ruined America—white people. I guess, ruining Brooklyn was just a dry run. The caucasian nation turned up in droves to vote for Trump so I don’t want to hear another thing about black voter turnout. How many times do we expect black people to build our country for us?

She then focuses on white women, noting that fifty-three percent of them voted for Trump. “Hope you got your sticker, ladies,” she says. “Way to lean out.”

There were still some victories for women and diversity on election night, as Sam Bee reminds us in a hopeful montage, before adding that America is already great in so many ways. She says, “We still have millions of nasty women who aren’t going away, and as long as women over 25 are still allowed on television I’ll be here cheering them on,” before ending with a message to pull yourself together: “Let’s get off the floor and get busy, especially you white women. We got some karma to work off.”

Contributing Writer, writing my first book for the Dial Press called The Lonely Hunter, follow me on Twitter @alutkin



Hopefully today will be my first full day of work. Yesterday I was sent home, “not as a reprimand, but to calm down and get some perspective.”

When I arrived yesterday morning, a couple of the jackasses I work with greeted me with big smiles and “So! Are you moving to Canada?!” (BTW, I’ve never said this). I smiled back and said, “Hell no! Are you kidding, I’m excited. White Power, amirite?? I can’t wait until it’s legal for me to kick a disabled Muslim or watch on t.v. as a Mexican rapist mother is torn from her children and sent to a country she hasn’t lived in in 20 years. My only question a woman under President Trump, do I register somewhere to get my pussy grabbed or just wait until I hear a box of Tic-Tacs being rattled??”

By that time several of my co-workers were staring at me with open mouths. And then I was called in and “counseled.” By the way, I haven’t calmed down, but I did donate to a couple of the groups you guys had up yesterday. Fuck this shit.