Two people, one thought: Marriage is so overplayed.
Us Weekly reported on Thursday that, per an anonymous source, Joaquin Phoenix and Rooney Mara, who have been dating since January 2017, “are so in love.” But wedding vows do not appear to be in the stars! “They’re never going to get married because they think marriage is too mainstream,” the source said.
The source went on, “Joaquin transforms all his girlfriends into being holistic, vegan, spiritual and into saving the world.” Someone give this source a Pulitzer. Nothing to do now but await the mending of the world through the miracle of Joaquin Phoenix’s micromanaging love.
Will Smith “won” the “In My Feelings” challenge, which means it’s over, we’re free, free I tell you!
- Bill Cosby’s neighborhood became inundated with cops on his 81st birthday. Reportedly cause of loud music? Perhaps, specifically, due to loud jazz music coming from Cosby’s home. Noise pollution and whatnot. [TMZ]
- Amy Schumer isn’t pregnant, in case you were wondering. [Page Six]
- Update: Actually, Nicki Minaj did not buy Cardi B an expensive gift basket or whatever. [TMZ]
- My theory is that this is all a big advertisement for lip fillers, for those thinking about it but afraid they won’t ever come out. [People]
- What crap. [Page Six]