RIP Dressbarn, The Worst Named Clothing Store

You’re probably familiar with Dressbarn, despite having never stepped foot in one. They’re always there, plunked dismally in every sprawling suburban shopping complex right between the Ulta and the Old Navy. But on Monday, Ascena Retail Group announced that it’s shutting down all 650 stores to focus on its other offerings. You know, stores that people actually shop at, like… Anne Taylor (?).

Ascena didn’t mince words in a press release, writing that:

“For more than 50 years, Dressbarn has served women’s fashion needs, and we thank all of our dedicated associates for their commitment to Dressbarn and our valued customers. This decision was difficult, but necessary, as the Dressbarn chain has not been operating at an acceptable level of profitability in today’s retail environment.”

Brick and mortar retail stores have been imperiled for some time as consumers increasingly prefer to shop online in their underoos. According to CNBC, more than 6,000 closures have been announced in 2019 so far at stores like Payless ShoeSource, Gymboree, Charlotte Russe, and Gap.

Pour one out for Dressbarn, which miraculously found success despite suggesting to women that they were shopping at a stable.