Sex. Celebrity. Politics. With Teeth
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Sex. Celebrity. Politics. With Teeth

Respect to This Woman Trying to Slow Down Speeders With a Hair Dryer

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Driving too fast on residential roads is one of mankind’s most obnoxious acts of hubris. It says both that you care more about arriving 45 seconds faster to your “appointment” (latte) than the safety of the pedestrians/cyclists/other drivers around you; but also that you believe your special superhuman reflexes will allow you to stop on a dime when a kid chases a ball into a road. Blegh.

One Montana woman has had enough, and decided to enact some benign justice of her own. Do you know what the difference is between a radar gun and a hair dryer? In practice, several things. In appearance...not much!

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Look at this bad bitch. Drink in one hand, dryer in the other. Slippers on her feet. I’d frankly be a bit scared of having my chair protrude into a road known for fast drivers, but Patti Baumgartner is probably tougher than me.

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“We were talking about maybe something would slow the cars down. So, we decided to put me in a chair and I guess use the hair dryer as a speed thing,” she told KPAX.

The the Montana Highway Patrol went on to make her an honorary trooper by giving her a hat and a badge, but like, let the woman do her thing without trying to make her look like a cop, you know?

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No one is really sure if Baumgartner’s speed trap is actually having any effect on passing cars, but I for one feel safer knowing she’s out there, wielding that unplugged dryer. Dry on, Patti.