Reader Roundup

Today’s best comments: Sexy as hell and fluent in Greek!

Best Comment Of The Day, in response to Baby Vs Cat: Cute Faceoff Ends With More Cute: “2001. That baby is now a ten-year-old and the cat is likely dead. Happy Friday!” • Best Comment Of The Day, in response to Hairy Issues: “That there’s what you call a Maverick Mullet—stupid in the front, party in the back.” • Best Comment Of The Day, in response to Why The “Omega Female” Doesn’t Exist: “I see where this is going.
The gamma male: Lives with his grandmother.
The delta male: Is always in a love triangle.
The iota male: Not much there.
The kappa male: Is found only in Japanese folklore.
The pi male: Is the enemy of #teamcake.” • Best Comment Of The Day, in response to “Try Me, You Won’t Regret”:

have a knotted PENIS in 5 minutes!!!guaranteed (N Indiana)

hello, my name is wtfox?!, I am 32 years old. I am a girl, and more than anything else in this world, I enjoy removing stupid men from the gene pool. A lot of time men just aren’t aware of how skeevy and douchey they’re being, but as a girl who almost worships decency and non-doucheyness, I taught myself everything that one needs to know about how to tie a penis (even a very small one) in an inextricable—one might almost say Gordian—knot. If you are a girl who wants that disturbing, leering asshole at the coffee shop, or the guy who writes Craigslist ads like “have a perfect VAGINA in 5 days!!!”, permanently removed from contributing to a future of douchey, skeevy behavior, please don’t hesitate to contact me. This is a volunteer service, although if he is under 18 I will probably just give him a stern talking-to and give him another chance. Try me, you won’t regret it. There is nothing better than having one less dick to worry about.

*it’s NOT ok to contact this poster with service or other commercial interests

Reminder: If you see a great, funny, insightful, eloquent (or awful) comment, nominate it! Email the comment and the timestamp link to the left of the comment to Hortense at [email protected].