Queen Elizabeth Seeks Royal Dishwasher, Clumsy Butterfingers Need Not Apply

Illustration for article titled Queen Elizabeth Seeks Royal Dishwasher, Clumsy Butterfingers Need Not Apply

Rumor has it that Her Majesty Queen Elizabeth of England could use a hand. A pair of hands, actually. On the Official Website of the British Monarchy, one will find a job listing for a position known as "General Catering Assistant (Wash-up)." Your mission, should you choose to accept it — er, be chosen to accept it:

You will join the team responsible for maintaining the cleanliness of the Staff Restaurant, wash-up areas and equipment in accordance with the Health and Hygiene Regulations to ensure the smooth operation of the Staff Restaurant.

Location? Buckingham Palace. But you must be "happy to travel and work at other Royal residences in the UK and at weekends." (Therefore you must not ask, "What is a week-end?") Salary? £14,200 a year — roughly $22,775. There's a chance you will be handling shitloads of fine china that absolutely must be washed by hand, but the ad insists you have a "flexible and willing attitude."

As David Kiefaber at AdFreak puts it: "I think that's code for 'Be willing to make a pittance cleaning up after people who get paid not to work.'"


[AdFreak, CBS News, Official Website of British Monarchy]

Image via Tengku Mohd Yusof bin Tg. Su/Shutterstock.

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Historically, the royals have always paid servants less than the usual "going rate" for whatever job they're doing because it was seen as a great honor to serve the royal family. Queen Elizabeth's grandfather was apparently of the opinion that servants shouldn't get paid at all because being in his royal presence was payment enough, but apparently the servants of London did not agree with him and he was forced to come up with the smallest wages he could find anyone willing to work for. People would do it simply because once you had worked for the royals it would be easy to get a job with a wealthy family who would pay you better because they wanted to be able to say they had hired people who had worked in Buckingham Palace. That may be true to some extent, perhaps whoever washes Queen Elizabeth's dishes will be able to quit in a few years and get a job washing dishes for Mitt Romney or someone who will pay them better because they like the idea of hiring someone who wants cleaned up for the royal family.