Michelle Carter’s boyfriend Conrad Roy died by suicide in 2014, allegedly at the urging of Carter, said to have coaxed him back into a car filled with carbon monoxide when he became frightened, and tried to end his attempt on his own life.
BuzzFeed News reports prosecutors are using Carter’s texts to argue that she was motivated by a need for attention. She supposedly considered herself friendless and unpopular, they say, and her texts to friends are now being read in court. In a long message to Samantha Boardman, a classmate, Carter essentially admits that she told Roy to get back in the car when he would have ended his suicide attempt:
Sam, his death is my fault like honestly I could have stopped him. I was on the phone with him and he got out of the [truck] because it was working and he got scared and I fucking told him to get back in Sam because I knew he would do it all over again the next day and I couldn’t have him live the way he was living anymore I couldn’t do it I wouldn’t let him.
Leading up to Roy’s death, Carter texted several people that she was anxious about him, and worried that he was dead. Following his suicide, Carter told friends that she should have seen the signs that Roy would harm himself—for instance, the fact that he purchased a generator to produce the poison that killed him.
“I’m so fucking stupid,” she told Boardman via text. “The generator he got the other day, I think that was the noise I heard... I think he poisoned himself with it and its all my fault because I should of knew he was gonna do that and I should of stopped him.”
But in texts with Roy, according to Buzzfeed, Carter urged him to buy that generator and use it:
Defendant: “You’re gonna have to prove me wrong because I just don’t think you really want this. You just keeps pushing it off to another night and say you’ll do it but you never do”
Defendant: “SEE THATS WHAT I MEAN. YOU KEEP PUSHING IT OFF! You just said you were gonna do it tonight and now you’re saying eventually...
Defendant: “But I bet you’re gonna be like ‘oh, it didn’t work because I didn’t tape the tube right or something like that’ ... I bet you’re gonna say an excuse like that”
Defendant: “Do you have the generator?”
Victim: “not yet lol”
Defendant: “WELL WHEN ARE YOU GETTING IT”
Carter told her friends that Roy had asked her to take care of his mom, who she claimed invited her over to pick up a letter he wrote her before his suicide. Roy’s mother testified that never happened, and that she handed Roy’s note over to the police. Carter also told friends that she’d be receiving some of Roy’s ashes following his cremation. She told them she had asked Roy to seek professional help and he refused.
“I started giving up because nothing I did seemed to help him,” Carter wrote. “I could’ve have stopped him but I fucking didn’t.”