The Year of Mercy is almost at an end (2016 was the Year of mercy?!), having commenced on December 8, 2015. During this magical year, Pope Francis imbued Catholic priests with the power to “absolve” anyone involved in an abortion, so they could still get into heaven and also the church itself for when the donation basket gets passed around. This was an ability only held by bishops, but now any old man in a fancy robe can cast their “no sin” spell on you.
CNN reports that on Monday, Pope Francis extended this superpower for priests indefinitely, writing in a letter that though he stills believes abortion to be a grave sin, he ultimately wants a policy in place that leads to more parishioners:
“I wish to restate as firmly as I can that abortion is a grave sin, since it puts an end to an innocent life,” the Pope’s letter states.
“In the same way, however, I can and must state that there is no sin that God’s mercy cannot reach and wipe away when it finds a repentant heart seeking to be reconciled with the Father.”
The letter continues: “May every priest, therefore, be a guide, support and comfort to penitents on this journey of special reconciliation.
“I henceforth grant to all priests, in virtue of their ministry, the faculty to absolve those who have committed the sin of procured abortion.”
Thank you, Pope Francis, for continuing to vilify women who seek abortions by making it an action that requires forgiveness from a virgin wearing a wizard costume.