Pickle Is Real

As improbable as it may seem, Dylan, aka “Pickle,” the nine-year-old boy who wrote a love letter to Donald Trump, is not Donald Trump in disguise. Pickle is real, according to The Washington Post, who tracked down Dylan and his mother, SueAnn, via Facebook.


Though it seems far more likely that Trump, a man who has pretended to be his own publicist and who maybe, probably, definitely is borderline literate, wrote, “I dont now why people dont like you. You seem nice can we be friends?” Little Dylan does, in fact, exist and did, in fact, have a Trump-themed birthday party.

“Yes. He’s alive,” SueAnn told the Post, adding that “He’s real. He’s not fake.”

Why, for the love of God, would a parent encourage an innocent child to cosplay as Donald Trump? This is SueAnn’s explanation:

SueAnn does not consider herself to be very political. She was a little taken aback by her son’s sudden love for Trump. (“I know you love him,” she whispered to the interrupting Pickle.)

But she is always behind her children “one-hundred percent,” so when Pickle asked for “a Donald Trump suit” for his birthday, she bought him one, and when he asked for “a Donald Trump cake,” she made him one herself, because she couldn’t find a bakery willing and able to do it.

“Do you think Donald Trump will live to be 100?” he asked her one day. She told him she didn’t know, and asked why he was asking. “Because then he can watch me be president,” Pickle told her. He’d been talking about writing the letter for at least a month before he got up the nerve to compose and send it.

The Post reports that, by press time, Pickle had watched the video of Sarah Huckabee Sanders reading his letter “five or six times since it first aired yesterday.”

Prachi Gupta is a senior reporter at Jezebel.


ZHP Sparky, the 5th

If this is real, is this seriously the level of language grasp (from grammar, to spelling, to penmanship) of a 9 year-old in the US today?

Not to make fun of a child at all – but if this is the level you’re able to communicate at, kid you deserve so much better.