To promote his Netflix “comedy” special, Pete Davidson invited the streaming giant into his basement apartment in New York, conveniently located in his mother’s house on Staten Island. As a home décor voyeur, I was genuinely excited to check out the sprawling, windowless flat he refers to as “The Cave.” (I was also hoping for an appearance from Mama Davidson, but she sat this one out. With good reason.) I should’ve anticipated what his space would look like—a 16-year-old boy’s dream apartment.
Davidson begins the tour by showing off some of his massive streetwear collection, stopping to examine a bright yellow SpongeBob SquarePants hoodie. Nice. He then moves into the bathroom and dubs his shower a “porno shower.” I wish I knew what that meant because it looks like there are no working lights in there and the adult entertainment industry is all about lighting, right? At least it appeared clean?
Then, like any bad boy skate punk I crushed on in junior high, he hops over a few video-game-playing friends to show off his toys: an alien statue named Kevin, some comic books, comedian memorabilia from bygone eras, a single Shaquille O’Neal sneaker...
...a giant TV, an Uncut Gems basketball from the movie Uncut Gems, a fake uncut gem also from the movie Uncut Gems, a Supreme bumper sticker, a picture taken with Judd Apatow...
...a John Mulaney basketball jersey, a Pete Davidson basketball jersey...
...and a wall with LED lights which he allows his friends to sign (mom would never!)
The only space where there could be natural light, it appears, is in Davidson’s bedroom, which he has covered up with what appears to be a few towels and an American flag pillow. Hell, at least it’s not the frat boy move of plastic trash bags, am I right?
According to my favorite website that is only ever incorrect, www.celebritynetworth.com, Davidson is worth $6 million. Even if he were worth $1 million, wouldn’t you think he’d like to invest in an interior designer to age his space out of grade school? Or, you know, to have windows?
At the very least, Davidson’s “Cave” is very on brand for him—immature, funny, and a little bit sad.