Illustration for article titled Open Thread: How Are You Surviving Quarantine With a Partner?
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When I got married, everyone told me the exact same thing, the first year is the hardest. But, Lord love a duck, I had no idea the first year of marriage would involve a pandemic that canceled both my wedding ceremony and honeymoon and forced me inside where I’m currently trapped at home with my partner 24/7. I imagine many couples are going through a similar experience and discovering that their partner is actually the most annoying person on the face of this earth.

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For example, my partner, who has no idea I am writing this, keeps forgetting to recycle his shampoo bottles and the cardboard center of toilet paper rolls. I gently remind him about recycling when what I really want to do is push him out of the window of our apartment, fourteen floors above ground.

In an effort to keep ourselves out of prison we have tried to pick up more “together” activities, which resulted in the purchase of several Assassin’s Creed games, on sale for less than 10 dollars. Assassin’s Creed is a video game that incorporates murder, history, and conspiracy theories broken out into several different trilogies that follow a similar thread. Mostly, the games chronicle a fictitious company called Abstergo and its plot to take over the world by hacking into the past via DNA. It’s wild.

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Last week I purchased Assassin’s Creed: Unity, set during the French revolution, and Assassin’s Creed: Syndicate, set in London during the industrial revolution. The ease with which one can kill people in Unity has been an incredible outlet for my low simmering rage and has given my partner and me something new to discuss. The game has quite a few side missions and I’ll likely try to complete every single one in an effort to extend the mental vacation I get from playing.

I can’t recommend the Assassin’s Creed franchise enough. How are y’all keeping your relationships afloat?

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