Officials Haven't Decided If Female Olympic Boxers Will Be Forced To Wear Skirts in Competition

Officials from The International Amateur Boxing Association (AIBA) nearly incited fisticuffs when they implied that the first ever Olympic female boxers will be required to enter the ring in skirts. But, calm down, Panicky Von Anxoius O’Feminista— they only might be required. Official uniforms for Olympic women’s boxing haven’t been finalized yet.

Last year, AIBA suggested that requiring ladyboxers to wear skirts would help them “stand out” from male competitors. Because I guess it’s really important that we be able to immediately tell from very far away that the people fighting are women instead of men. Some fighters aren’t too enthused about the possibility, remarking that they don’t even wear skirts when they go out to bars with their friends, much less while in the throes of athletic competition.

If AIBA officials are interested in helping female fighters stand out from their male counterparts, perhaps they should consider official uniforms that are more functional than a punching skirt but still scream “Lady contained herein!” Why not just make the uniforms hot pink and bedazzle “GIRLZ ROOL 2!” or “MRS FEDERLINE” in rhinestones across the butts of the shorts? Why not compel them to wear hair extensions or fight in bikini tops? What’s female boxing if not foxy?!

The AIBA said, in a statement released today, that a final decision regarding what the first female Olympic boxers will wear will be made in January. In the meantime, London’s pervert community eagerly awaits the potential skirts’ implications for low angle camera shots of the competition.