Look, I’m just here to report the news, please do not shoot the messenger. Armie Hammer posted an Instagram story video of his two-year-old son putting Hammer’s toes in his mouth, with the hashtag “#footfetishonfleek,” which was unfortunate. The video was very short and included the voice of someone, presumably Hammer’s wife Elizabeth Chambers, joking, “This is not normal,” as their son giggled.
The internet collectively froke out, presumably in part due to the hashtag, but I must remind everyone that toddlers are, in general, a weird bunch, and think lots of “abnormal” shit is funny, including poop, pee, and farts. Perhaps posting it was ill-advised, but it was not as odd as some people made it out to be, as Chambers later wrote on Perez Hilton’s Instagram (simply typing that made me die inside, a little). Per E! Online:
“It wasn’t seven minutes...more like five seconds,” she commented on Perez Hilton’s Instagram post about the video. Our son likes to play with people’s feet and I put the video on our family stream because this phase is an ongoing joke. Sharing the video on Instagram was def not the best move on A’s part, but I can assure you that our children’s safety and well-being is always our first priority.”
So yeah: A toddler was putting his father’s toes in his mouth as a joke, and found it funny because toddlers find lots of things funny. It may be inscrutable to you and I, assuming we are not toddlers, but it is fine.
Prince Harry and Duchess Meghan are disputing that they delivered rules to their Frogmore Cottage neighbors about how to interact with them. According to the Sun, an eminently entertaining British tabloid, the rules included not petting their dogs, not asking to babysit Archie, and not putting anything in their letterbox, which all sound pretty normal for anyone, royal or not—I would be skeptical if any of my neighbors randomly wanted to care for my hypothetical infant child, and not just because my neighbors smoke truckloads of weed and stumble up the stairs at 4 a.m. on a Monday.
However, a spokesperson for the royal couple told Us Weekly that the rules are fake: “The Duke and Duchess didn’t request this, didn’t know about it, and had nothing to do with the content or guidance offered.” Which seems right, since Harry and Meghan are clearly focused on living their lives as low-key as feasibly possible, though again, I do think they might want to consider putting the no-babysitting rule into effect.
- “Swae Lee apologizes to Kimora Lee Simmons for his ex’s IG beef with her daughters” [Bossip]
- Sophie Turner and Joe Jonas continue to deal with the sad hit-and-run death of their puppy. [TMZ]
- People are mad at Snooki’s Insta of her bottle-feeding her baby while drinking wine. [People]
- Richard Branson’s “adults-only cruise line,” kay. [Celebitchy]