MTV, Thirsty for Viewers, Is Now Making Challenge Contestants Dry Hump

Real World/Road World cast members fucking for entertainment is nothing new (find out what happens when people stop being polite and start mic’ing headboards), but fake-fucking for sport? Unheard of until last night, but as The Challenge: Rivals II proves, there’s a first time for everything.

On last night’s episode, teams competed in what host TJ Lavin (who looks great for 170) called the “sexy challenge.” Challengers first had to thrust at the handles of a saw until the saw managed to cut through a branch and then had to carry each other in a 69 position, hold balls in their mouthes and give up any sense of dignity they ever had. Luckily, no one had a lot of dignity to lose.

Of course, TJ was using the word “sexy” very loosely because it was basically the least sexy thing that any of us have ever seen and that’s saying something because I once watched Philip Seymour Hoffman ride a bicycle. Anyway, no one accidentally cut their wiener off and, as is always the case with The Challenge, no one was a real winner. All in all, another disappointment for Music Television.