Meghan Markle's Nephew Will (Sort Of) Gift the Royal Couple With Wedding Weed 

There’s a lot of rogue merchandising coming out ahead of the upcoming royal wedding—I can’t imagine the Queen approves of these Prince Harry & Meghan Markle-themed condoms, for instance, or maybe she’s progressive. But my favorite off-brand souvenir apparently comes courtesy of Markle’s own family, with the Daily Mail reporting that Markle’s Oregonian weed-growing nephew plans to cultivate a special strain of marijuana in honor of the happy couple. Will this push the U.K. to legalize cannabis? Definitely not, which is too bad! Planning a wedding is fucking stressful.

Per the Mail, Markle’s nephew is one Tyler Dooley, 25, a licensed medical marijuana grower in Grant’s Pass, Oregon who is certainly not using his aunt’s wedding as a publicity tool. Dooley, like the Obamas and myself, was NOT invited to his aunt’s wedding, but that hasn’t prevented him from planning to craft her and Prince Harry a very special gift—a new strain of marijuana, dubbed Markle’s Sparkle.

Since Dooley won’t be at the royal wedding, and also because cannabis is still completely illegal in the United Kingdom, he can’t actually give Markle and Harry Markle’s Sparkle, though if they came to visit him, he told the Mail he hopes they partake in it. “Meghan grew up in California and I am sure has an American view on pot,” he said, adding, “Prince Harry enjoys a good party.” He also noted that he hopes the couple will hit him up to discuss marijuana’s medicinal properties, reiterating that weed “helps everything from post-traumatic stress syndrome to insomnia to pain in cancer patients.”

All that is true, but I’m still bummed Dooley can’t get Markle and Harry to get blazed in St. George’s Chapel pre-ceremony on May 19, which might take some of the pressure off what will likely be a very buttoned-up affair, based on what I’ve gleaned from The Crown.