Meet the Women Willing to Spread Coronavirus to Fight For Donald Trump

On Saturday, the Trump Women’s Tour stopped off in Wisconsin, rolling into town in a giant pink empowerment bus to a cheering crowd of dozens. The tour features the major players from the Real Housewives of the Sunken Place, including senior advisors Katrina Pierson and Mercedes Schlapp, Trump’s director of communications, Erin Perrine, and first daughter-in-law, Lara Trump, the Bethanny of the group. Presumably, the women’s main agenda is to ensure that the 53% of white women who voted for Donald Trump the first time do it again in 2020. But perhaps attending events that are almost completely mask-free is not the way to entice voters to the polls?

Look at all those breath particles just shuffling around freely into the wide-open mouths of people cheering for a bus. The Wisconsin leg of the tour will stop in Milwaukee, Green Bay, and De Pere. While posts from the tour’s first stop in Wisconsin featured mostly white women, two other groups—Latinos for Trump and Black Voices for Trump–were present and highly visible. I wanted to believe that those groups were made-up, but it turns out there are a solid two women that the organizers could convince to pose with signs.

The pink bus of doom has stopped in several states as part of an 83-day road trip to activate women voters, with only some stops attempting to adhere to any kind of social distancing effort. On a tour stop in Pennsylvania, Katrina Pierson managed to leave an entire foot of space between herself and a voter. Snaps for Katrina!

Pierson and her comrade Mercedes Schlapp opted to skip masks on this part of the Pennsylvania stop because masks are not empowering and Women for Trump is all about empowerment. In fact, anyone who wants to get updates on when the big pink bus will be in their town just needs to text ‘empower’ to 8022 in order to…be empowered, I guess.

Interestingly enough, while the tour seemed to take every opportunity to highlight Biden’s absence from tour stops, there are no videos or explainers on exactly how Trump will specifically help women. Instead of anything tangible, the women are promoting church stops and mother-daughter moments—an image of faith, family, and bright pastel colors that imbue some murky idea of empowerment. Maybe if I’m really lucky, the pink empowerment bus will roll into my town and I’ll get sick and die before having to hear any of these women bullshit their way through an empowerment speech.