You did it, Internet: Kirk Cameron's Saving Christmas, starring Kirk Cameron as smug prick "Kirk," is now the single worst-rated movie on IMDB. This hour-and-change-long Facebook rant from your second-cousin Sam the seminary drop-out now ranks lower than Superbabies: Babies Geniuses 2, The Hottie and the Nottie, and From Justin to Kelly.

That's via the Raw Story, which notes that a film must receive at least 1,500 votes to qualify for the list. So it's not just five disgruntled AMC ticket-takers and the ghost of Increase Mather down-voting this claptrap over and over and over and over again. Meanwhile, over at Rotten Tomatoes, the movie has an astounding 0% freshness rating. But you don't have to take my word for it!

In the words of reviewers, via Rotten Tomatoes:

"With a smile so wide and laughter that sounds so forced you half-expect the camera to pull back to reveal hostage takers, Mr. Cameron explains how several facets of the holiday β€” the tree, Santa Claus, gifts β€” have roots in religious tradition." β€” Ben Kenigsberg, New York Times.


"Had 'Saving Christmas' run any longer, Cameron would no doubt have found a way to find the divinity in Frosty, Rudolph, the Grinch, peppermint bark, the Elf on the Shelf, frosted cranberry hand soap and Mr. Hanky the Christmas Poo." β€” Alonso Duralde, the Wrap.

And Bill Zwecker of the Chicago Sun-Times called it "a Christmas stocking filled with tedium." I would have said a Christmas stocking filled with used Q-tips and rotten eggnog, but I guess they're a family paper.


Nevertheless, Kirk Cameron's Saving Christmas has cleared $2.5 million in ticket sales (which is substantial, considering the budget was probably $132 and a bucket of off-brand cheese puffs) and will soon expand to an additional 100 theaters (says Kirk, anyway). This is your weekly reminder that CHRISTMAS DELENDA EST. Even the Puritans agree!