A great prophet once said, “It’s 0 to 60 in 3.5—Baby, you got the keys. Now shut up and drive.” Throughout the many ages of humanity, her truth has endured. Accompanying it is the collective ennui of millions of California drivers, looking for a little escape, feeling trapped and isolated under the crushing gridlock of a complex freeway system closing in around them. I wonder, then, if Kendall Jenner heard the great prophet’s words Wednesday afternoon, cruising around greater Los Angeles in her vintage Cadillac. After all, the same scripture also says: “I got class like a ‘57 Cadillac, and overdrive with a whole lot of boom in the back.”
Amid widespread closures and social distancing measures in Southern California, it’s easy to feel trapped, alone, restless. Especially with the great, big, sunny outdoors beckoning to you always, endless tracts of strip mall parking lots reflecting the ever-present brightness of the sun. Kendall Jenner, who took a cruise in her top-down Cadillac in a pair of medium-tiny sunglasses, had the right idea. Her look of apathy as she cruised through Calabasas even reminded me of high school, and driving down country roads after a big fight with my parents with the windows down in my Jeep, silently crying to a Rihanna song.
Despite the smog, or accident-prone drivers, or the overpowering smell of stale concrete, I imagine the wind on your face must feel quite nice right now. I wonder, then, what on earth Jenner was listening to in her car? [Hollywood Life]
The above video, which features a bunch of celebrities singing John Lennon’s “Imagine” together, is an objectively nice thing. There is no malice to it, no ill intent. These are people looking to make someone’s day better, bring a smile to a face that hasn’t seen one in a minute. And that is commendable! But despite knowing all this, and hyping myself up to even broach the topic, I have yet to see this attempt at broad unity as anything other than cloying and misguided, just like the sentiment most have appropriated from Lennon’s original song.
In her caption, Gadot writes: “We are in this together, we will get through it together. Let’s imagine together. Sing with us ❤ All love to you, from me and my dear friends. #WeAreOne.” First, what exactly are we imagining with Gadot in this moment? That everything will go back to “normal,” that we will collectively come together as the human race to overcome the obstacles before us? I prefer, in this moment, that things be a bit more specific.
There’s more I could probably say, but I shouldn’t, because I know I’m probably overthinking it. I wish them all the best in this newest endeavor. And maybe, hopefully, someone has a better day because of it. It’s the small things, I guess! [Instagram]
Gemma Collins is now fighting for dolphins and orcas everywhere.