Katy Perry Reportedly Recorded a Song Called 'She's So Creepy,' Hmmm

Image via Getty.
Image via Getty.

Star is reporting that vocal supporter of Hillary Clinton and Orlando Bloom’s penis, Katy Perry, has written a few songs for her upcoming album that may or may not shade the hell out of her nemesis, Taylor Swift. “Katy is more than happy to capitalize on Taylor’s damaged image,” Star claims.

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They continue:

Star can reveal that Katy has registered the song titles “Crocodile Tears” and “She’s So Creepy,” as well as “Last Cry” and “Victory.”

Perry’s fourth album, presumably titled I’ve Performed at the Super Bowl and Hillary Clinton’s Presidential Nomination and All You’ve Done Is Sit On Some Ugly Rocks With an Englishman, is expected to drop this fall.

[Celebitchy]


After reading this story last night while in bed and half asleep, I was ready to lead this morning’s Dirt Bag with the headline: “A Warrant Is Out For Tyga’s Arrest Because He Owes His Landlord $480,000,” but after waking up and giving it a second glance, I realized I had completely misread the story.

People writes:

“There has been a settlement reached to the mutual satisfaction of the parties, the terms of which are confidential,” Danny Abir, attorney for landlord Gholamreza Rezai tells PEOPLE.

“My law partner, Boris Treyzon, will appear in court Friday morning to ask the judge to quash the bench warrant since a settlement has been reached and our client is satisfied,” Abir continues.

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So everything is fine! Tyga is not going to be arrested! But also where the hell did he get $480,000—especially after spending $200,000 on Kylie earlier this week?! Hmmmm, I wonder.

[People]


Barf. Barf. Barf. Barf. Barf.

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Staff Writer, Jezebel | Man

DISCUSSION

sipowitz
Sipowitz

Is he keeping her safe because there’s an earthquake happening and that’s why they’re standing in a door frame?