Justin Bieber Barely Survives 4 Minute Interview Without Whining

Justin Bieber is trying to become the new and improved Bieber but, like, can’t stop being the old sniveling Bieber. Change is tough, eh?

In a new interview with the French brand Clique (via the Huffington Post), which famously got Kanye West to reveal that race is a figment of our imaginations, Bieber also got personal. Though for Biebs, his depths are limited to four minutes before he starts crying about how long the interview is, then digging deep to reveal that he’s just trying to find acceptance while wearing his hoodie and gleaning advice from North West’s chatty dad.

Here’s what Bieber had to say on his and Kanye’s musical collaboration:

“We did some stuff for the album but it was really cool, really New York vibe. Kanye’s a talker, so you get him in a room and he just starts ranting and I just sit and I listen because he’s been through a lot of stuff. He’s not just talking to just talk, he’s obviously got something to say that he’s feeling from his heart so… I just like to sit and listen. He’s a really, really smart guy… [his one piece of advice was] You got to give them that music that’s like ‘Fuck you.’”

As in, “Fuck you,” it’s so good that it can’t be denied. He also spoke about trying to rebuild his image:

“I’m just kinda walking on eggshells right now. I‘m trying to make sure people don’t think I’m being disrespectful. When you tell people you’re gonna represent belief and hope and then you’re off not really doing that, people get mixed messages. If I would’ve come out smoking weed, that would’ve been my image but it wasn’t. Now I just want people to see me like a normal dude with my hoodie ‘cause I’m comfortable and just chilling, not trying too hard.I just want to show people I’m normal.”

Don’t we all like to be swaddled? Yes, yes we do. Also, rumors make him crazy….

“Of course, certain things will get back to me, but, like, at the end of the day I try to tell all the people around me, like, if you hear something about me, don’t tell me. ‘Cause I’d rather just not know then hear it and start thinking about it too much. I don’t need to know.”

…and he says he has a “funny” friendship with serial domestic abuser and boxer Floyd Mayweather:

“He’s Money Mayweather, he likes to talk about money but not in a weird way. He’s like ‘Make sure you’re getting those checks Justin, make sure no one’s getting over on you. They gon’ know you’re talking to Floyd.’ It’s just funny.”

But if he could make any changes in America, since celebrities like Kanye are announcing their candidacy and all, he’d focus on guns. Because America clearly can’t be trusted.

“I’d probably fix some of the gun laws. In Canada we don’t really have any guns and there’s no gun violence. That really solves it. They think it’s for protection and stuff but it always ends up in some bozo’s hand.”

And then, when the interviewer says that he’d love to see him collaborate with Young Thug (ok?), Bieber’s like ‘Dude, I already have, you should listen to me sometime.’ Then the Canadian googled his own song and played it for the interviewer, presumably so he’d stop asking the Biebs questions.

Additional important information: Bieber’s top five MCs are Eminem, Ma$e, Nas, Biggie and 2Pac.