Just yesterday, I, a stupid person, watched Kim Kardashian’s interview on Ellen—the one where she refused to discuss the alleged pregnancies of her sisters Khloe and Kylie—and thought about how dull they all suddenly were. The E! machine has spent over 10 years squeezing stories out of this family, and their latest is as boring and textbook as a struggling sitcom’s sixth-season finale.
Their popularity is waning, I thought. In popular culture’s increasingly bleak landscape, there is suddenly less room for the faux-drama of their ever-growing family. But just 24 hours later, I was proven wrong. Americans still aspire to be like the Kardashians. We want to live in homes like theirs. We want to have “jobs” like theirs. We want to have paychecks like theirs. Bodies like theirs. Odors like theirs.
TMZ reports Thursday that Kim Kardashian West’s new perfume line, KKW Fragrance, made $10 million on Wednesday. 10 million dollars in one day. (Its first day!) And, they report, no one’s even smelled it yet. They threw their money at these frosted white crystals of smells because they trust Kim and the rest of her family to know what’s best for them.
I can’t wait to spend 600 Global Dollars on [the unnamed third baby’s] 2037 line of implantable memories!!!
In sad news, emo rapper Lil Peep has died at 21. In the two months since his first album was released, Peep’s fame had skyrocketed as he became tabloid fodder for both his rumored love interests and unique sound/appearance.
Here’s what his girlfriend Arzaylea Rodriguez posted on Instagram after hearing the news:
Lil Peep’s body was reportedly found on the bus during a stop Wednesday in Arizona. He had posted a photo earlier in the day with what appear to be prescription pills in his mouth and the caption, “fucc it.”
- The Transparent writers are reportedly preparing for a season without Jeffrey Tambor. [Deadline]
- I’d rather watch Ellen Burstyn and Hugh Jackman Host ‘Mother!’ Screening than “Mother!” [Page Six]
- Anna Faris is traipsing around Europe with her new boyfriend. [ONTD]
- I hope this book makes a billion dollars. [Page Six]
- I hope this double date happens and I hope there are pics. [People]
- I hope this phone falls in a toilet. [Us Weekly]