Jesus and Mary Magdalene Are Living Together

Image via Backgrid.
Image via Backgrid.

After falling in love while filming Mary Magdalene, an upcoming movie about one of history’s most iconic and smoldering unconsummated romances, Mary (Rooney Mara) and Jesus (Joaquin Phoenix) are now living together “in the Hollywood Hills,” roughly 6600 miles from where they met, in Nazareth. Oh, excuse me, Mary Magdalene was filmed in Italy.


News of the couple’s decision to live in sin was broken in a T Magazine profile of Phoenix written by Brett Easton Ellis. (How perfectly annoying.)

Phoenix’s life is remarkably simple compared to what people might imagine. He lives with Mara in the Hollywood Hills (he’s never been married and has no children) and is usually asleep by 9 p.m. and up at 6. When he’s not working his daily routine consists of answering emails, ‘‘chilling’’ with his dog, meditating, taking a karate class, eating lunch, reading scripts and dinner — but for most of last year he’d been on location.

My favorite photo from their time “on location”:

But I’m going to stop myself here before spending 1000 words on how much I love those photos of Rooney Mara taking a long drag behind the crucified body of Jesus Christ. The best part of the T profile was this bit about what Phoenix and Mara watch on Netflix.

When asked if any recent films have excited him, he thinks about it, stuck, and then answers, genuinely surprising himself: “Moana! I thought it was beautiful.’’ (He later corrects himself and says it was actually The Lost City of Z, James Gray’s latest — Phoenix has starred in four of Gray’s seven films.)


[Page Six]

An excerpt from Anna Faris’s upcoming book was published in the latest issue of Cosmopolitan and I would like you to read part of it.

I was once told that I didn’t need a tight group of girlfriends because Chris [Pratt] should be my best friend. But I never bought that. The idea of your mate being your best friend — it’s overhyped. I really believe that your partner serves one purpose and each friend serves another.


Though she doesn’t really seem like the type who’d enjoy spilling tea about their exes (regardless of how angry she may or may not be with him) I expect to find plenty of small and revealing quotes like this one in her book.


Some news:

Image for article titled Jesus and Mary Magdalene Are Living Together


  • Daniel Day-Lewis “broke his arm in a motorbike accident” and has been shuffling around the village in a cast. [Page Six]
  • Shailene Woodley on her mugshot: “I wish I’d known that this was going to be as public as it was...I would have made, like, a face. I’m just looking at the person [taking the photo] like, ‘Are you kidding me right now?’” [Us Weekly]
  • How the hell is Warner making news in 2017?! [Us Weekly]
  • Scott Disick was placed on an involuntary 5150 psychiatric hold last month, but is back to shooting KUWTK. [Page Six]


JujyMonkey: unstable genius

Asleep at 9pm, up at 6am, loves Moana, plays with his dog.

Joaquin Phoenix is a toddler.