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Jamie Lynn Spears Is Now a Hit Songwriter Thanks to Horrifying Country Single 'I Got the Boy'

Jamie Lynn Spears, former Nickelodeon star and sister of Britney Jean, has just reached a fairly significant milestone in her blossoming songwriting career: she’s entered the Billboard Hot 100. Spears co-write Jana Kramer’s “I Got the Boy,” which debuted at No. 92 this week.

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It’s nice to know the younger Spears is making a name for herself outside her sister’s shadow, but it’s hard to listen to her first hit as a songwriter without thinking, “............What?”

“I Got the Boy” isn’t merely “a rueful country ballad about a young lost love,” as Billboard wrote. It’s the twangy ramblings of a woman obsessively recounting a young lover after learning of his marriage to someone else, who seems to be convinced that her relationship with “the boy” was more special than his new wife’s relationship with “the man” - as though some hand stuff in the back of a pickup truck 12 years ago was as important to him as finding the woman he wanted to marry.

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Just a look at the chorus:

I got the first kiss, she’ll get the last

She’s got the future, and I got the past

I got the class ring, she got the diamond and wedding bad

I got the boy, and she got the man.

Those lyrics could be interpreted as harmless, but the bizarre video—which features Kramer draping herself on and around couches in a house filled with hoarded artifacts from an old relationship—suggests she hasn’t quite processed the breakup just yet.

“If things were different, I had a choice, which would I choose?” she asks later. How about someone else, Kramer! Choose someone else! Jamie, please write her a song about unfriending that dude on Facebook and choosing someone else!


Contact the author at bobby@jezebel.com.

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DISCUSSION

Look, feminists. I love us. We’re a great bunch, for the most part. But Christ on a cracker, are we literal and judgmental when it comes to song lyrics. Everything is always taken to the nth degree, to the worst possible interpretation. Couldn’t this song just be about someone who’s taking a look back on her life and thinking maybe she screwed up by not hanging onto this guy? Does it have to be that she obsesses about him daily and she never got over it and her life all revolves around the past?

People sing about feelings they have. Feelings that we can either have in passing, or occassionally, or all the time. I get tired of being told that “You Belong With Me” is a Nice Girl song because of Taylor Swift’s very human feeling that she would be better for someone than his/her current partner. Or that Jamie Lynn Spears is somehow a whackadoo stalker for thinking “Wow, I wish I’d known that immature guy I dated in high school would grow up to be great.” You’re not somehow more immature and totally unstable if you relate to that feeling.