I've Given My Heart to WWE's Finn Bálor

I stopped watching professional wrestling sometime in my late teens after some girls told me it wasn’t cool and I continued to not watch it into my early 20s until eventually, I found myself living with a man who still appreciated the spectacle of wrestling. Since we only had one TV in our tiny apartment I found myself pulled in once again to the convoluted storylines and sequined outfits of the WWE and its many characters. It was during this personal wrestling renaissance that I laid eyes upon the man that I would truly risk it all for if given the chance: Fergal Devitt aka Finn Bálor.

Upon seeing Bálor for the first time, it’s obvious why one would be attracted to him. He’s got abs you can grate cheese on, legs the size of two toddlers, a jaw that looks like it’s got some endurance behind it, and crystal blue eyes which rival the clearest Caribbean waters. What’s not to like?

But it was getting to know Bálor as a character that really sealed the deal and skyrocketed him to the top of my list of Famous People I Will Absolutely Sleep With If Given the Chance and My Husband Has to Just Accept It.

One of the things that makes wrestling fun to watch is the artistry that wrestlers put into their characters and this is true for Bálor who made me fall in love with him by simply executing his entrance with maximum effort and perfect timing. A lot of wrestlers, especially the well-established ones, really phone in their entrances. But Bálor never does. He hits every single musical and lighting cue as if his life depends on it. He makes meaningful eye contact with the camera as if he’s about to fuck it or kill it or maybe even both.

Then there’s the pose.

As Bálor approaches the ring he jumps up onto the side of it, leans back on the ropes, flips his signature leather jacket open and pushes his crotch as far out as it can go so the camera can sweep over his bulge which is covered just barely by man panties that are color-coordinated with his boots. It’s a scene that should be playing a loop in the Louvre.

Whether he’s playing a lovable loser or an in-ring villain, Bálor—who lives his life as married man Fergal Devitt— appears to be your standard Nice Guy, which only adds to his appeal. He loves his wife, he loves to exercise, and he loves his job even when it doesn’t love him back, like the time he broke his jaw during a match and had to just keep on going and eventually work his injury into his storyline. His Instagram page is filled with fan art that’s been sent to him (which he calls “finnart”) and selfies where he sports his signature ear-to-ear toothy grin. Not to mention, he’s also trying to learn Spanish, the first language of his wife, Mexican sports journalist Vero Rodriguez.

Como no puedes amar a este hombre?