Is Today...Good?

Artist’s rendition of today by Bobby Finger
Artist’s rendition of today by Bobby Finger

Do you remember the last time anything felt good? Of course you don’t, and that’s because it’s been a very long time since anything was good. I was pretty sure that portion of my brain that feels joy or pleasure or even mild contentment was removed by psychic surgeons in the dead of night sometime back in November.


I’m confused, then, because today almost feels like it might be... pretty good?

Let’s look at two and a half pieces of evidence:


Republican leaders withdrew their terrible replacement healthcare bill after Donald Trump first pressured them to vote on it, then decided he didn’t want them to vote on it. (In between, Paul Ryan rushed to the White House to tell him they didn’t have the votes to pass the thing.)

The vote is dead, the ACA will stand indefinitely and provide people with lifesaving coverage, and the president is probably very embarrassed. Failing to secure a vote on this terrible bill is a rebuke to his entire agenda and a stunning indicator of his incompetence and failure to secure consensus even among his own party.

That seems... quite good?


Media Matters reports that Alex Jones has apologized for fanning the flames of Pizzagate, the conspiracy theory that alleged that a ring of DC elites are sex-trafficking children from the basement of a pizza parlor. Jones specifically apologized to Comet Ping Pong owner James Alefantis, the restauranteur he previously implied was probably keeping children in the basement.

In December, Jones deleted a video he’d made encouraging people to go to Comet Ping Pong to “investigate” the allegations. That might have been because a man named Edgar Welch did go to investigate them, bringing along a rifle and firing shots inside the pizza parlor.

Welch pleaded guilty today on two firearms charges, and will be sentenced in June, when he faces between three and 20 years in prison. And Alex Jones released what we believe to be an extraordinary and unprecedented apology, admitting that his “commentary” on Pizzagate was wrong.


Via Media Matters:

In our commentary about what had become known as Pizzagate, I made comments about Mr. Alefantis that in hindsight I regret, and for which I apologize to him. We were participating in a discussion that was being written about by scores of media outlets, in one of the most hotly contested and disputed political environments our country has ever seen. We relied on third-party accounts of alleged activities and conduct at the restaurant. We also relied on accounts of reporters who are no longer with us. This was an ever-evolving story, which had a huge amount of commentary about it across many, many media outlets.As I have said before, what became a heightened focus on Mr. Alefantis and Comet Ping Pong by many media outlets was not appropriate.

To my knowledge today, neither Mr. Alefantis, nor his restaurant Comet Ping Pong, were involved in any human trafficking as was part of the theories about Pizzagate that were being written about in the media outlets and which we commented upon.I want our viewers and listeners to know that we regret any negative impact our commentaries may have had on Mr. Alefantis, Comet Ping Pong, or its employees.

We apologize to the extent our commentaries could be considered as negative statements about Mr. Alefantis or Comet Ping Pong, and we hope that anyone else involved in commenting on Pizzagate will do the same thing.


Jones has, for the first time I can recall, acknowledged that he made a statement that did real harm and apologized for it. It might have been under threat of litigation — it feels that way — but nonetheless, he did that.

One half:

We have green tea Kit Kats at the office today, nature’s most perfect food. I spent like $40 on candy in Chinatown last night.


That’s it. That’s all. Are we overreacting here? Please weigh in: is today good or what?

Anna Merlan was a Senior Reporter at G/O Media until September 2019. She's the author of Republic of Lies: American Conspiracy Theorists and Their Surprising Rise to Power.



I honestly don’t know, but I’m going to take today to enjoy 45's massive failure. Which I made sure to tweet to him and Ryan.