Illustration for article titled Is The Coronavirus Attempting to Cancel Men and Also Cruises?
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It brings me no great joy to admit that I have a deep and abiding love for two things that I would really probably be better off without at the end of the day; men and also cruises. Men, unfortunately, I cannot help, as there is something inside me that compels me be drawn to them against my will (not because I don’t want to be gay, I’d just rather not be gay for men). My affinity for cruises I could help, as I understand that they are an entirely ridiculous endeavor we should have all really given up on after the Titanic, but damn if there isn’t something alluring about slurping down soft serve in a bathing suit on a pool deck in the middle of the ocean. Now, thanks to the coronavirus, it might not be up to me at all, as both the future of men and cruises are, apparently, in jeopardy.  

In news that will be shocking to pretty much no one, men are dirty. According to public heath studies, not only do men not use soap when they wash their hands, they also don’t seem to be washing their hands to begin with, like at all — even in the face of infection and disease. And it’s one of the factors contributing to the higher rates of mortality men experience when they come into contact with the coronavirus.

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According to an analysis published by the Chinese Center for Disease Control and Prevention, although men and women being are infected by the coronavirus in equal measure, the death rate among men is double that of the women who are infected.

And it is not just hand washing (otherwise known as common sense and hygiene) that has bolstered women’s immunity, it’s also genetics. “There’s something about the immune system in females that is more exuberant,” Dr. Janine Clayton, director of the Office of Research on Women’s Health said.

It’s a fact that, personally, I’d love to be talked about more, especially when people who just plainly hate women attempt to pull the nonsense biological superiority card when talking about men being more fit to lead — I don’t care if a dude can life a heavier box, it’s not much good if he’s going to be taken out by a common cold. I’d take an exuberant immune system over a big bicep any day.

Of course, as we know, the coronavirus is not just any common cold. A fact that passengers aboard the Diamond Princess cruise ship became intimately aware of the final night if their two week long voyage, when the captain announced that someone who had left the ship nine days prior had been found to have been infected.

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What proceeded in the subsequent weeks since the passengers of the ship have been quarantined is nothing short of an actual nightmare come to life. 634 infections and two deaths have been reported in the largest outbreak of the virus outside of China, with more total infections onboard than have been reported in every country where the virus has been found combined.

According to The New York Times report from the ship, everyday activities like buffets and Bollywood dance lessons, both questionable ways to send one’s time regardless, became breeding grounds for infection. And while the ship has begun to allow passengers off the ship, it’s been reported that there is the potential some who have been released have not been thoroughly tested and cleared of infection.

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Perhaps, for the time being and for your own safety and the safety of others, it would be best to continue to avoid cruises, and also men.

Weekends at Jezebel, freelance writer living in San Francisco. Please clap.

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