iPhone's Autocorrect Refuses to Suggest That You're Typing 'Vagina'

What you have here is visual proof of the iPhone’s refusal, against all reason, to suggest that you’re typing the word “vagina.” V-A-G-I-N… Where else might a user be going with these letters if not “vagina” or some variation thereof?

Bacon. Yes, clearly. Any user in their right mind definitely meant to type “bacon.”

The autocorrect feature — in particular, the gibberish typos it often creates — has long been a source of amusement. There are websites, endless posts, and an entire book devoted to the stuff. But what about those times when you expect autocorrect to actually do its job? If you’re talking about your ladyflower, you’re on your own.

The iPhone is actually remarkably stubborn about vaginas. “Cagina” is off by one letter, and C is located directly next to V on the keyboard. Stands to pretty strong reason that the user meant to type vagina, right?

Nope.

Okay, “caging” is fair — only off by a single letter. But cabins? That’s a two-letter difference. What’s with the willful ignorance?

I tried some other easy typos: bagina, gagina, fagina, hagina. These are all pretty obvious vagina typos. Once again, they’re only off by a single letter, and I chose letters that are located relatively close to V on the keyboard (I’ve found that autocorrect has been somewhat consistent about making suggestions — often correct — based on the keys’ physical locations).

How’d that go?

With only one exception, all of the suggested words required changing multiple letters. In the case of “hagina,” the iPhone’s autocorrect went so far as to suggest that I actually meant to type two words. On additional attempts, the iPhone suggested words like “fauna” and “having.” It’s almost like the computer is going out of its way to avoid a key feature of female anatomy.

For good measure, I went through every other letter of the alphabet — all 25 letters except for V — and not once did autocorrect suggest vagina. Instead, I got stuff like this:

• aagina: again a
• dagina: Saginaw
• magina: magona
• ragina: raging
• tagina: tahini
• wagina: wagons

And so on and so forth. (The lone exception: “pagina,” which is real word.)

For what it’s worth, the situation with penis wasn’t much better.

On the bright side, autocorrect did suggest “uterus” when I had typed “ureru.” So I guess that’s something? We ladies should take what we can get, after all.