"Twilight" fan Katherine Ramirez, 14, of Rancho Cucamonga, Calif., shows off her sneakers as she awaits Thursday's "The Twilight Saga: Eclipse" premiere at Nokia Plaza in Los Angeles, Wednesday, June 23, 2010. (AP Photo/Chris Pizzello)
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Erin Gloria Ryan
... use your vampire teeth to bite holes in them so that your feet can escape, fully sentient beings, and have a dog's feet fall in love with them immediately.