I See No Difference Here

Illustration for article titled I See No Difference Here
Screenshot: Columbia Records/eBay listing (Fair Use)

Welcome to This ___ Reminds Me of Harry Styles, a series in which I discuss stuff that is Harry-adjacent. Lots of things remind me of Harry Styles, and this is one of them.

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It’s Harry Styles Week! (For incisive coverage of the election, look here. For a welcome distraction... keep reading.) Everything is unbelievably stressful right now, and to combat that, I’ve decided to lean into my Harry Styles obsession to an undeniably chaotic level. Boy bands keep me from defenestrating daily, and I’ve been told every American resident could use a reason to stop themselves from Superman’ing out of a tall building this week, so why not?

Last summer, I attempted to kickstart a new, infrequent blog series called “This ____ Reminds Me of Harry Styles,” in which I’d find a way to convince my bosses that admiration for Harold Edward Styles is an evergreen topic worth consistently covering for journalistic reasons, pegged to nothing. So far, that has worked only once: when I compared the former One Direction heartthrob to Milana, a polar bear who lives in Hanover, Germany and enjoys an ice cake full of frozen fruit. This time, a new Harry has emerged—“Yellow rain hat Harry”—and he reminds me of yet another bear, a fictionalized, marmalade-loving sweetie from “darkest Peru.” That’s right, it’s my friend and yours, Paddington Bear. The resemblance is uncanny.

“Yellow rain hat Harry” is new to this earth; he was born on Monday, Oct. 26, 2020, when the official music video for Harry Styles latest single, “Golden,” premiered. Paddington Bear, on the other hand, has been in our hearts and minds since 1958, when author Michael Bond published his children’s book, A Bear Called Paddington. Both Styles and Paddington have English accents, both delight children and adults alike, and now, both have yellow rain hats. It’s glorious. I see no difference between them, truly. And now, neither will you. Go ahead, share it with a pal who is likely having a bad day. It’s both healing and very horny, how could they resist?

No. Senior Writer, Jezebel. My debut book, LARGER THAN LIFE: A History of Boy Bands, is out now.

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DISCUSSION

I have a similar obsession with another tattooed English actor/singer, so I get the inclination to see HES (in my case JCB) in things.