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Here's Kate Middleton by a Babbling Brook

Illustration for article titled Heres Kate Middleton by a Babbling Brook
Image: Getty

The Windsors are really on a publicity tear in recent weeks, and the latest imagery is so pastoral that daisies might start sprouting from your ears just looking at this photo of Catherine, Duchess of Cambridge, hovering over a briskly running woodland stream.

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Of course, it’s not a “real” woodland stream—it was build for the Chelsea Flower Show. The royals have a long history with the Chelsea Flower Show, which has just opened, and this year Kate worked with designers on a “Back to Nature” themed garden meant to illustrate the importance of playing outdoors, according to People. (Presumably parents already know that, and it’s often a question of accessibility, not awareness.)

Hence the series of photos released over the weekend on the official Kensington Palace Instagram, featuring Kate’s three children, George, Charlotte, and Louis, romping around the site. The monarchy is modernizing, all right—by adopting the techniques of a social media influencers. Look at all these relaxed Windsors communing with the bucolic soul of England, via a carefully crafted show garden designed by award-winning landscape architects Andrée Davies and Adam White, as per Town and Country. The barefoot future king of the United Kingdom, cooling his feet!

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Illustration for article titled Heres Kate Middleton by a Babbling Brook
Image: Kensington Palace

It’s monarchy—but organic and free-range. Available at a natural market near you.

Here are two future kings, seemingly trying to figure out this longbow, which has come a long way from decisive military technology at the Battle of Agincourt to woodsy prop. Anybody seen Robin Hood around here?

Illustration for article titled Heres Kate Middleton by a Babbling Brook
Image: Kensington Palace
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But today Kate returned to show the garden off again, in another press event, without the rest of the family, and she is serving some combination of Disney princess, pre-Raphaelite Ophelia, and Victoria at Balmoral, maybe with a thrilling little frisson of Narcissus. (The woman did major in art history, after all.) Just don’t fall in!

Illustration for article titled Heres Kate Middleton by a Babbling Brook
Image: Getty
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Literally the very image of carefree unconcern.

Senior Editor, Attic Haunter, Jezebel

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DISCUSSION

JaneLucPicard
Jane-Luc Picard

As someone who lives in the middle of a city, and whose “representatives” haven’t set aside land for a new park in decades, and who seem more interested in maximizing revenue than forcing developers to build in green space for the thousands of new residents they are cramming into my neighbourhood. FUCK THIS.

You’ve noted this: people need access to quality, well-maintained green spaces that are accessible to the public. Unfortunately that is not a priority for those in power. Maybe Kate could focus on this instead?

ALSO this isn’t real. Our real woodland has been cut down and paved. And there’s this whole “climate catastrophe” we could be worrying about? Fuck you Royals.

Apparently I have #vitriol today.